Finding Your Purpose: Why 90% of Women Are Still Searching
Only 10% of people say they're living in their God-given purpose. The rest? Stuck. Searching. Spiritually frustrated. As I look out at the remarkable women in our community – founders, executives, artists, philanthropists – I see extraordinary achievement. Yet beneath the surface of success, many of you have confided that something still feels missing. The psalmist writes, 'You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence' (Psalm 16:11). Today, we'll explore why, despite your tremendous success, you may still be struggling to find that path – and how God's approach to revealing purpose often looks different than we expect.
You think your calling is too small.
The first reason many struggle is that you think your calling is too small to be God ordained. In a world of TED talks and viral sensations, you keep waiting for a spotlight calling... but God often works through the quiet, the hidden, the overlooked. Mary was 'only' called to be a mother... yet her 'yes' changed the world. She became mother of the Messiah. Scripture reminds us, 'Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin' (Zechariah 4:10). In our achievement-oriented culture, we've been conditioned to believe that purpose must be grand, visible, and impressive. But God's economy of purpose operates differently. The Kingdom advances through faithful stewardship of what seems small – the daily acts of obedience, the unseen service, the quiet consistency that may never trend on social media but eternally impacts souls.
2. You think your calling is too big
Conversely, the second reason is that your purpose seems too big – you're running from giants. Fear has you frozen — not because the calling isn't real, but because it looks impossible. Remember David? He didn't avoid Goliath. He walked toward him, because he knew Who sent him. Sometimes God puts giants (impossible odds) in your path because He wants to powerfully intervene. David declared with confidence, 'The battle belongs to the LORD' (1 Samuel 17:47). Many of you are visionaries. You see possibilities others don't. Yet that very gift can become paralyzing when the vision God gives seems beyond your capabilities. The question isn't whether you're capable – it's whether you're willing to partner with the God who specializes in impossible situations. Your five smooth stones may seem inadequate against the giant of your calling, but in God's hands, they're more than enough.
3. You’re stuck in what was.
You may be stuck in what was. You've evolved and are chasing interests and activities that don't fit the new version of you. We are not static beings. We grow, we change. This is the nature of life. It is normal for our interests to change. As we continue to invest in ourselves, we see the world with different eyes. As our roles change, so do our priorities and so can our calling. You're looking for purpose in a version of you that no longer exists. But God declares, 'Behold, I am doing a new thing... do you not perceive it?' (Isaiah 43:19). Purpose isn't a static destination but a dynamic journey. The Sarah who laughed at God's promise was not the same Sarah who eventually held Isaac. The Peter who denied Christ three times was not the same Peter who later built His church. Your purpose at 25 may not be your purpose at 45 – and that's by divine design, not deficiency.
4. You may be confusing calling with career.
Not every purpose leads to a paycheck. Jesus spent 30 years in obscurity and 3 in ministry. His identity was never tied to His job, but to His Father. Jesus’ calling was always Messiah, even while he was still a carpenter. In our achievement-oriented society, we've merged identity with occupation. We ask children 'What do you want to be?' rather than 'Who do you want to become?' This creates a dangerous expectation that purpose must be monetized to be legitimate. But what if your highest calling isn't to the boardroom but to the living room? What if your greatest impact comes not through your professional title but through your presence with those who need your wisdom, your mentorship, your example of faithful living?
5. You’re waiting for the whole blueprint.
Finally – and this is where so many find themselves stuck – you're waiting for the whole blueprint. You won't move unless God shows you everything. But purpose is revealed in pieces — through obedience. Abraham left without knowing where he was going. Faith took the first step. Hebrews 11:8 says, “By faith Abraham when he was called… obeyed and went even though he did not know where he was going.”
Scripture also reminds us, 'Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path' (Psalm 119:105). Notice the imagery here – a lamp doesn't illuminate the entire journey at once. It shows just enough for the next step. In a world of GPS and five-year strategic plans, this incremental revelation feels insufficient, even irresponsible. You've built companies with clear KPIs and measurable outcomes. You've mapped career trajectories with precision. Yet God rarely works this way. He gives fragments, not frameworks. Whispers, not whitepapers. This isn't divine withholding – it's divine invitation into relationship. Each step requires returning to the Guide. Each fragment necessitates ongoing conversation. If He gave you the entire blueprint at once, would you still seek His face daily? Would you develop the muscle of faith that grows only through exercise in uncertainty?
My Journey: From Puzzle Pieces to Purpose
I understand this struggle intimately. It took time, earnest prayer and seeking before God opened up the bigger picture for me. But I had been OBEDIENT in the little steps that didn't make sense at the time. I was able to go back to my journals and put the puzzle pieces together into a cohesive whole. These were the promptings that created the business I have today. Looking back, I can see how God was working – how each seemingly disconnected step was actually part of a greater purpose. But in the moment? Those steps often felt random, even counterintuitive. Had I demanded the complete blueprint before taking the first step, I would still be waiting, rather than walking in the fulfillment I experience today. This is the paradox of purpose: clarity often comes through movement, not meditation alone. As we step out in faith with what little we understand, the path gradually unfolds before us.
If this sounds like you, I want to offer three practical steps:
1. Get quiet before God. Set aside 15 minutes today. No music. No phone. Just ask: 'Lord, what's one step You're asking me to take in this season?' Not the five-year plan – just the next right thing.
2. Open the Word — not just your journal. Read Isaiah 43, Psalm 139, or Romans 12. Highlight what stirs your spirit. Listen for alignment, not affirmation of your own ideas. God's Word provides the framework within which authentic purpose always operates.
3. Write down the whispers. Even if it doesn't make sense yet. God often speaks in fragments before He reveals the full picture. Document the impressions, the recurring themes, the gentle nudges that come during prayer. These fragments will eventually form a mosaic of meaning. Remember: Purpose isn't discovered in a moment; it's discerned over a lifetime. It's not a destination but a journey you faithfully walk, one obedient step at a time.
My dear sisters, you were created on purpose, for purpose. The frustration you feel isn't evidence of God's absence but of His invitation. He's calling you deeper, beyond the achievements that have defined you, into the authentic purpose that will fulfill you. Stop waiting for the complete blueprint. Embrace the mystery of purpose revealed in fragments. Trust the God who sees the end from the beginning, even when you can only see the next step. As Proverbs 3:5-6 reminds us: 'Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.' Stay faithful. Keep seeking. He IS speaking. And as you move forward in faithful obedience to the fragments He's already given, you'll find yourself walking – step by step – into the purpose for which you were uniquely designed. The world needs what only you, in your purpose, can give. Don't keep us waiting.
If you would like a guided approach to hearing God’s voice about your purpose, download my purpose discovery workbook here, “7 Days to Greater Purpose” .